Monday, April 12, 2010

Has the RECESSION impacted or caused undue stress on your marriage?

Good day WIVES,

This topic post was given to me by another faithful WIFE follower. I think it's a great topic.

"HOW THIS DREADFUL RECESSION HAS IMPACTED OR CAUSED UNDUE STRESS TO YOUR MARRIAGE?"

FOR EXAMPLE, ONE OR BOTH SPOUSES GOT LAID OFF DUE TO THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL OF THE ECONOMY. HOW ARE YOU ABLE TO HANDLE IT: MENTALLY, SPIRITUAL OR BOTH. IS ANYONE GOING THROUGH COUNSELING TO REPAIR ANY FORESEEN ISSUES PERTAINING TO THIS PARTICULAR TOPIC?

For me and my husband personally the recession has effected my household to an extent. I say that because my husband is a realtor and before the recession he was selling alot of houses and making alot of money! I worked too, but I worked part-time. I worked part time for 7 years! I made good money off my commission. But slowly the housing market started to change and my husband was selling less and my job changed the commission structure and wanted more hours out of me.Then I quit! Then my company closed it doors a year later anyway! So yes it affected our finances BIG TIME. But we got through it with prayer for sure and starting other businesses. One thing about my husband, he has a real entreprenuer mindset and he is still a realtor (has a closing this month THANK GOD!) but he does other things to bring money into this house. I am grateful for that, b/c I never have to worry about him TRYING! Now things may not always work out how he thinks it will, but he TRIED! He is not a sit on his butt guy. And I am not either. If you knew me, you would know that. I am always doing something, trying something.

As far as the relationship aspect, it did get to me emotionally b/c when a woman is use to having money and now it's not there, you start to itch! LOL.. but for real, you get antsy... like what are we going to do? But we never had to go to counseling and we never thought about breaking up over it. It's a financial bump in the road. And we deal with it as it comes and keep it moving.

Ladies, your turn.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

i feel you Bernaeatta Just like pastor said. no money no honey!!!!!!!!

The WIFE! said...

If you are going to call my name out, you could at least put who you are! LOL... seriously though.

Carrie said...

my husband and I were both laid off...it's been a year, and we've been staying afloat only because he decided to open his own computer repair business, at first I was very sceptical thinking..this is not the time to start putting money into something and we are still trying to make a full recovery but we just moved into a bigger shop and I started working with him, instead of waiting to watch him falter...with that said I believe that our relationship has grown. The bills have too but one step at a time has gotten us this far! I cried for months but it didn't get my job back, or a call for an interview and atleast someone who knows my worth is getting good use of my skills!

Anonymous said...

As far as financial issues placing an unnecessary strain on a marriage I know that all to well. In the past we depended on two incomes that allowed a very very comfortable life style. Once we decided to move to follow my husbands dreams things changed. I do not mind being a stay at home mother, but I have realized that my own "At Home" ventures must revolve around my children's activities and my husbands expectations of me. Having to go from working in corporate America with a very good salary and buying what I wanted when I wanted has put me in a whirlwind. Going from working for many years prior to marriage and already having a career and my own freedom to being submissive and relinquishing the financial reins is definitely a wake-up call when you depend on one income. Conversation is key; if there is no dialog between the two of you, you will never be able to move beyond what "The Wife" refers to as the financial bump in the road.

The Realist said...

Good Lord! I must say that this subject is relevant whether there is a recession or not. Financial strain on the marriage can definately cause stress on both parts. The woman who is accustomed to the lifestyle and the man who is accustomed to providing it. My husband and I have been through, over, under, and around the bump in the road. When there is a dependancy on more than one income and it becomes one, let's just say whoever lost the income gets the "itch", but the stress comes in when your partner begans to point fingers instead of continuing to do what they've always done....support you. Communication is a must factor when this happens...communication with the most high. Yes talk with your spouse, but you have to talk to God to get you through financial stress. If you don't, it will cause a rift in the marriage and other issues will rise up and potentially claim you relationship. I know first hand how this can damage a marriage, but with God, restoration in all areas, especially your finances are possible.

wife K said...

It wasnt me that ask for the question but need the replays being that it was not the recession but being that I quit my job of 14yrs its been hard for me to just allow my hubby to foot or handle it all with out stepping in or having a back up plan but by his grace all is well and things have been fine had a bump but was able to come over it with his mercy.

April Pickett-Moncrief said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
April Pickett-Moncrief said...

I love this topic because I think most marriages face something like this (a financial crisis or recession) at some point in their union. My marriage, like many others, experienced some difficulities due to the downturn in the economy plus, I was a stay-at-home mom for about 2 years "during" the onset of the recession. So I know all too well of how it feels to be really comfortable then to be a little uneasy. But by his "GRACE & MERCY", which brought (and is still bringing)us through, we are doing pretty good however, it's definitely not like it use to be. And I can honestly say, that might be a good thing. This "downturn in the economy" has actually brought us a little closer together. We kind of rely on eachother a little more than we use to (when the "ends" were everflowing-lol). And we also rely on "him" more now than anything. Sometimes what we see as a bad spot or as we sometimes refer to it, "a bad financial bump in the road", it's sometimes Gods will so that we can learn to depend on him "more" and not on our "ends":-).