Thursday, April 12, 2012

The Good and Bad of Marriage

The Good and Bad of Marriage Hello ladies, I decided to respost a BLOG from the past!! Sometimes we just need a reminder, and good information or a good blog post never goes out of style.
Enjoy!

Marriage itself has it's pros and cons, its good, its bads, its ups and downs. And every marriage is different. Just like you should compare yourself to another person (in most cases), you shouldn't compare your marriage. So today, I wanted to talk about the GOOD and the BAD of Marriage in your oppinion. Or the GOOD and BAD of your Marriage. Your choice. My only request is that if you write about the GOOD, you must write about the BAD.

Good: As for my marriage or marriage period, I like the commitment aspect. I like the fact that if you love someone and they love you that you agree to come together and create a family, a lifestyle, have common goals and work towards them, grow and enjoy life together. I like the family aspect. I personally knew who my father was/is, but he didn't father me. I even had a stepdad in the house for at least 10 years, but he didn't father me either. He was just there physically. I always knew something wasn't right about that and knew I didn't want that for my future. My husband is a great father and very involved in every aspect of our children's lives. I like the fact that we are a team when it comes to our children. I like the safe feeling my husband gives me. Not the fact that he takes care of me kind of safety but the fact that he is just here feeling. When he's home, it's like awwww daddy's home. When he's not, I hear every crack in the floor! I personally like the fact that my husband pays the bills! Yep, he sure does. And he pays them on time. He started paying the bills when I was pregnant with our first child b/c he didn't want me to stress out and afterward just kept doing it. I love always having someone to talk to, bounce ideas off of, and living with the person you should trust the most. And of course as far as intimacy without getting to graphic, I like being with one person you trust PERIOD! It's crazy out there, sometimes I feel for singles who have to get condoms, get sexual history, go get tested and still don't really know .... all before you have sex!

BAD: Sacrifices! Both parties make sacrifices BUT to me... women make more sacrifices. A woman takes care of her husband, the children and the house. When is it time for her dreams outside of the home? Can she have dreams outside of the home? When do they fit in? I mean TO ME, back in the day alot of women just wanted to do what I just stated above. But growing up as a child, I never thought about it from a parent perspective. I was just dreaming and working towards my goal. I knew one day I wanted a husband and children but I also wanted a career and to do great things outside of the mother-wife role. I didn't realize until I got married that as the WIFE that I would have to slow my roll! Another thing that I personally don't like that as a WIFE it seems like I am asking permission to do something from my husband versus just letting him know. I mean I am a grown a** woman! LOL! But still, that's the way it seems. I don't like the fact that as a WIFE you always have to watch what you say in reference to the MIGHTY MALE EGO! You always have to pump that EGO! WTW!! Make them feel good. Blah blah blah! Shoot! PUMP ME UP! Who is feeding my EGO! "I walk like this 'cause I can back it uuuup!" (~beyonce) I have more to say but I will let you all talk.

Go ahead ;)

16 comments:

Donnie Brown said...

The good about marriage is growing together; pushing each other to do better. Making where ever you are into a house and not just a home/apartment. As a man I love to pay the bills take my kids to practice and be a husband/friend to my wife.

The bad about marriage: It is not all about you anymore even without kids you still have to respect your spouse and I think this is when you lose yourself identity. As a man is does it get little overwhelming to take care of the family. I know it has to be rough for woman with children to want to have a career and be mom and be a wife. That is the new society that we live in and both wife and husband have to learn to play their role.

D WWAHHMpreneur Johnson said...

I love that you've created this conversation space here. My thoughts:

Good - I am grateful that I married the right person for me. My husband is very patient ... I am a work in progress ... no he's not perfect, either, but he's perfect for me. :)
He has always taken care of me and the kids (married for 12 years); and I am truly truly grateful that last year he took over the bills and the shopping ('cause he's a great couponer), so this has freed me up to pursue my calling (founded an org and a ministry over the last year or so)

Bad - like you, I also have found the stifling of my personal career aspirations to be a bit disappointing BUT, honestly, hubby has kept me out of a lot of trouble 'cause sometimes I need to be stifled. lol ... gotta be honest. I also don't like that sometimes I feel guilty because I have started working on one of my dreams, even though my family is supportive, helpful and never complain ... don't know why this "mommy guilt" just never seems to go completely away

BernettaStyle said...

Wow! You two made very good comments and I am so glad to get a Male's point of view! You both give really good food for thought! Thank you again. And yes, that MOMMY GUILT is a BEAST!

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Mary Wilkie said...

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My name is Mary Wilkie from England.
My boyfriend of a 4yr just broke up with me and am 30 weeks pregnant.I have cried my self to sleep most of the nights and don’t seem to concentrate during lectures sometimes I stay awake almost all night thinking about him and start to cry all over again.Because of this I end up not having energy for my next day’s classes ,my attendance has dropped and am always in uni and on time.Generally he is a very nice guy ,he ended it because he said we were arguing a lot and not getting along.He is right we’ve been arguing during the pregnancy a lot .After the break up I kept ringing him and telling him I will change.I am in love with this guy and he is the best guy I have ever been with.I’m still hurt and in disbelief when he said he didn’t have any romantic feelings towards me anymore that hurt me faster than a lethal syringe.He texts me now and then mainly to check up on how am doing with the pregnancy,he is supportive with it but it’s not fair on me, him texting me as I just want to grieve the pain and not have any stress due to the pregnancy.i was really upset and i needed help, so i searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested that Dr Unity can help solve marital problems, restore broken relationships and so on. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a spell for me. 28 hours later, my bf came to me and apologized for the wrongs he did and promise never to do it again. Ever since then, everything has returned back to normal. I and my bf are living together happily again.. All thanks to Dr Unity. If you have any problem contact Dr.Unity now and i guarantee you that he will help you.Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com ,you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348071622464 ,His website: http://unityspelltemple.yolasite.com .

Mayor Vargas said...

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Mike Robinson said...

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I'm so excited my broken Marriage has been restored and my husband is back after a breakup, After 2 years of marriage, me and my husband has been into one quarrel or the other until he finally left me and moved to California to be with another woman. i felt my life was over and my kids thought they would never see their father again. i tried to be strong just for the kids but i could not control the pains that torments my heart, my heart was filled with sorrows and pains because i was really in love with my husband. Every day and night i think of him and always wish he would come back to me, I was really upset and i needed help, so i searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested that Dr Unity can help get ex back fast. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a (Love spell) for me. 28 hours later, my husband really called me and told me that he miss me and the kids so much, So Amazing!! So that was how he came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and he apologized for his mistake,and for the pain he caused me and the kids. Then from that day,our Marriage was now stronger than how it were before,All thanks to Dr Unity. he is so powerful and i decided to share my story on the internet that Dr Unity real and powerful spell caster who i will always pray to live long to help his children in the time of trouble, if you are here and you need your Ex back or your husband moved to another woman, do not cry anymore, contact this powerful spell caster now. Here’s his contact: Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com ,
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Alvin Lee said...

how i got my ex boyfriend back after a break-up.
I'm Alvin Lee 21 yr old from UK,
My boyfriend left me when i was 7months pregnant. A week after he left, I found out he was dating someone who posted a picture of him kissing her in facebook and that she “loves this man”. I am sick to my stomach. I want him back I do not want to be apart much less separated. I love my boyfriend and I want to fight for him. I’m so scared of losing him. i knew my boyfriend and i also know that some thing else was involve on this, when i found out that this Girl use a Black magic spell on my boyfriend just to take him away from me, i was so devastating this as a result also destroyed my heart and soul because i love my boyfriend and i really want to get back with him i have seek for different counselling, nor could work out for me so i started given up on my boyfriend because there was no hope on getting back with him. one faithful night after my work,, I searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested Dr.Unity can help get ex back fast, restore broken relationships and stop a divorce. So, I felt I should give him a try.
I contacted him and told him my problems and he told me what to do, and i did it and he did a {love spell} for me. 28hours later, my boyfriend called me and apologized for the wrongs he did and promise never to do it again. Ever since then, everything has returned back to normal. Thank you Dr Unity for saving my broken relationships and brought my boyfriend back to me!"..
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Debbie Kladke said...

Hello everyone,
I'm from USA, I and my husband got married for more than 11 years and have gotten two kids. thing were going well with us and we are always happy. until one day my husband started to behave in a way i could not understand, i was very confused by the way he treat me and the kids. later that month he did not come home again and he called me that he want a divorce, i asked him what have i done wrong to deserve this from him, all he was saying is that he want a divorce that he hate me and do not want to see me again in his life, i was mad and also frustrated do not know what to do,i was sick for more than 2 weeks because of the divorce. i love him so much he was my everything to me without him my life is incomplete. i told my sister and she told me to contact a spell caster, i never believe in all this spell casting of a thing. i just want to try if something will come out of it. i contacted Dr Iyaryi for the return of my husband to me, they told me that my husband have been taken by another woman, that she cast a spell on him that is why he hate me and also want us to divorce. then they told me that they have to cast a spell on him that will make him return to me and the kids, He cast the spell and after 1 week my husband called me and he told me that i should forgive him, he started to apologise on phone and said that he still live me that he did not know what happen to him that he left me. it was the spell that he Dr Iyaryi cast on him that make him come back to me today,me and my family are now happy again today. thank you Dr Iyaryi for what you have done for me i would have been nothing today if not for your great spell. i want you my friends who are passing through all this kind of love problem of getting back their husband, wife , or ex boyfriend and girlfriend to contact Dr Iyaryi ,if you need his help you can contact him through his private mail: driayaryi2012@hotmail.com And also Reach him on WhatsApp Number: +2349057915709 Thanks Dr. IyaryI

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