Wednesday, February 10, 2010

When is it ok to call the IN-LAWS on your Hubby?

OMG ... me and my hubby got into it big time today! Mainly because we went to a Superbowl party last night, "WHO DAT!", I had to throw that in there. But when we left the party, we brought home fried chicken, red beans & rice made with sausage for the children to have for dinner the next day. Well, when I woke up I realized I didn't put the food in the refrigerator. I was mad, but hey in my mind the food is no good. SO my husband puts it in the refrigerator (around 8:30am) and later that afternoon tells me that he plans on giving it the kids tonight! OH NO HE IS NOT! I had to put my foot down. I personally don't think it's safe. Now we are on the phone so he can't see my neck rolling and hands waving but believe me I am letting him know with the tone of my voice if he tries to feed the kids that food he is going to have a battle with me.

He feels it's safe! I don't. And because I don't they are not eating it. His argument is it's safe and just because I feel a certain way doesn't make it a fact - they are his kids too and if he wants to feed them that food that was left out, they will be ok! So we are going back and forth. I am yelling, he is yelling...... back and forth, back and forth. Finally I say, "If you think it's good you eat it then!" We get off the phone and I CALL HIS MOMMA! Now I might be wrong for that, what do yall think? I needed support and besides our Pastor (LOL) he will not listen to anyone but his MOMMA! So I told her what happened and she agreed with me. And even though she said the chicken might be fine (WTW!), she said if I don't have peace about it, don't let the kids eat it. And if we can't agree, just don't let the kids eat it! SO.... after all that................ The kids ate Captin D's! I won that battle! Smiling!

So I ask, "When is it okay to call in the IN-LAWS?"


wife k said...

Not sure if I can shed any light but I think when it is a life or death situation so in that case it could have made kids sick so you did right however what happen to him eating it?

Anonymous said...

Uh, never! LEAVE AND CLEAVE! Gen 2:24, Matt 19:5, Mark 10:7

You are ONE FLESH. In-laws should not be involved in marital issues. If you feel that you need to bring others into an issue to help, then the root of this is that there are communication issues that need to be resolved. Spouses should be seeking wisdom from God and other Godly married people that have had years of experience and will speak truth. This does not mean, go to them first (them--being people, not God!). Always seek God for his wisdom in HOW and WHEN to speak to your husband. if you have the right words but use them at the right time---they're useless.

Family sticks with family. If you cry to your in-laws about a problem with your husband, they may smile now and possibly even help, but pray there never comes a day when he turns to them for something with you and they flip. They'll remember the times you bad mouthed him when you thought you were just venting to them and it was ok. He may forgive you when it's all said and done, but they may not.

The choices we make today will affect our future, so choose wisely!

my two sense!

The WIFE said...

Good points from both! And HE STILL HASN'T ATE IT! I am putting it in the trash today.

As for the other post. Really valid points. And believe me, I hardly ever ever go to them but in that case... I just really needed his mom to back me up! But mostly all of our issues we handle ourselves. BUT GOOD POINT! I receive it!

Wife L said...

I agree with keeping them out, but when it involves the children and their health, I don't think there's anything wrong with asking the "moms". If someone is sick we turn to the mons for advice. They are passed where we are and for the most part have wisdom. Since you don't go to them for everything I think that it's cool to do every now and then. Like Anonymous said, just pray about it an go about it however God says. But, don't go to them when you are having marital problems. You'll have to have a mature christian who can be objective in order to be able to talk to them. I think you did the right thing B. You only went to her because she is the only one he would listen to!

The Wife said...

Oh! He ate the red beans and rice tonight!

Thanks Wife L for your words!

Wife L said...

You are welcome. Thanks for the site and the anonymity. This is a great outlet for me. I am forever indebted to you girl!