Tuesday, April 12, 2011

When is it the end of a friendship?

Have you ever had a friend and you were super close and all of a sudden things just changed? If you really examine the friendship, most likely things didn't just happen. It was probably slowly changing and you didn't catch it. Have you ever had a best friend one day and the next day you two were just cool. You two don't call each other like you used to or hang out like you used to. You see her name on the caller id and don't answer. She has an event or party and for whatever reason, to you it's not important enough to go. You try to communicate to each other and it's still just not clicking. The sad part is that neither one of you did anything horrible to each other. Neither one of you lied or stole from one another, but for whatever reason the friendship just went down hill. Has that ever happened? What did you do? Do you just let the friendship go? Do you try to really restore it? Is it the "People are in your life for season, reason, or lifetime" line that people love to say? Just a thought.

If it's worth saving, I think it would be a good idea to sit down and communicate. Neither one might not really know what the other is personally going through. And sometimes when you are going through personal issues, your actions are different. You sometimes say things you don't really mean or do things you might not actually do if your circumstances were different. If it's not worth saving............I guess that response is up to you.


MsDior said...

Well, well, well, I think I may have 2 cents on this subject...lol!!! Some relationships are worth saving, but I think that sometimes we force relationships that God wants us to let go of. For example, you've gotten married, but most of your friends are still single...uuumm not a good look, so you begin to meet new people that compliment where you are in life. Not to say that you kick your homegirls to the curb, but you must consider your lifestyle change and this could cause some friction in the relationship. You may began to experience the situation you spoke of...seeing her name on the caller id and not answering or just not hanging out as much, etc. You know what I'm saying...sometimes you gots to know when to hold them, fold them, and let them go...okaaaay! I think it's just a matter of feeling your spirit...you know when it's time to just let it go. The question is, why don't we? Just evaluate the relationship for what it truly is, if it doesn't add value to your life then it's a dead thing. After a while dead things began to stink if we don't burn it, bury it, or throw it out...so one must decide if they want to carry a dead thing around...I DON'T, I WON'T!

Mr. Man. said...

Hey B I'm back. (lol) I think the truth is that in a lot of time friendships are one sided & it’s only noticed after it is over. I know I had 2 friends that I though we would be friends for life but it didn’t turn out that way. One friend seems to only show up when he needed something, but camouflage it took look like his need was just coincidental. I helped him purchase a car & paid his insurance for six months. He drove off the lot and I didn’t hear from him again until last year. Side note, this was back in the mid 90’s when I helped him. And even then it was a friend request on FB. Lol my response was keep it moving. The other was a friend since high school, and we only would talk if I called him. He would act like it so good to hear from a home boy and we must keep in touch. But when waiting for him to call it never happened. The strange thing is when ever some one talk to him that we both know he always asks if I came in. I went to his wedding and he was like man it is so nice that you came,but again after that no calls. And the kicker was when my sister past away (who I might add he was friends with as well. He didn’t call or anything. So I say all that to say this, we all have our own idea of what it take to be a friend. But it’s a two way street. A friendship is like anything else in life if there are no dividends how much/long should you keep investing. Only you can look at you returns and make that decision. Mr. Man.