More children? If not, what form of birth control are you using?

I am on the fence about what to do. I have two children and honestly do not want anymore. My husband is also fine with the two blessings we have been given. He also said it's up to me if we have another one, he is cool either way. He said as long as we can afford them, he's fine. Smh!


Well, personally I don't know if I have the mental tolerance for another child. I am just being honest. My children are 6 and 4 and are a handful. Don't get me wrong, my children are great kids. They love school, to play games, try new things, run around and have fun! And I love that. But to go through pregnancy all over again, getting my body back, diapers, staying up all night, turning over pissed off at my husband because he is sound asleep, trying to juggle a new born and little kids, daycare fees, etc. It's a little too much. #forme. I look up to women that have more than 2! I really do. And the funny thing is, from time to time I think about it. I always joke and say, we planned the first two and if I get pregnant again it's because God wanted me to have another baby.

Well that leads me to the birth control question. Right now I am taking pills, but I am tired of popping pills. I don't want to pop pills forever and I haven't even thought of asking my hubby to snip snip (I just thought of that as I was typing!). So my other option is the IUD? What are your experiences with it? I have had it once before, right after I gave birth to my second child. I had small complications but I am willing to try again. It's 4 years later and I am willing to try again. Is there a particular brand you use? I know they have 5 and 10 year IUDs. I would try a 5 year. I also hear there is this new foam method where they insert foam over your ovaries and that blocks anything from entering into your tubes. Ummmmmmmmmm, I will pass. LOL! That is too new for me.

Update: Since I wrote this blog, I did ask my hubby about him getting a snip snip! He said, "No! I don't want surgery." I said, "Don't you like that is unfair to me, to have to be the one responsible for "controlling the births?" He said, 'Honestly, you are right. It's really not fair. You are right." And there ya go. I just sat there. (We were oh the phone, or I would have popped him! LOL).
What do you use?

I have joined an accountability group! Write it down, Make it Happen!

This is year is going to be different! This is going to be MY YEAR! This year is blah blah this and blah blah that! But do you say that every year? What about 2012 is going to be different? Are your actions going to change? Have you transitioned your mindset? I am just asking because if it hasn't then I guess 2013 is going to be your year.


This year I am doing something different. I have joined an accountability group. We actually had our first meeting a few days ago. We have agreed to meet every other week for lunch! What is an accountability group? It's similar to an investment group, but the stock is in ourselves and the dividends pay a higher yield than most mutual funds. I recently read the book Write it down, Make it happen by Henriette Klauser and she is in a similar group. That is actually where I got this idea from. She read a book called Wishcraft, by Barbara Sher, and that's where she got the idea from. Sher recommends meeting on a consistent schedule with what she calls "success teams" to support each other in making dreams a reality.

The set-up is simple. Each week in a little memo book, write down your respective mini-goals, the piece of the puzzle that will eventually make the big picture: "By next week I will...." And then copy, as well, the others persons' promises. This not only makes each of you committed, it also makes you accountable.

Henriette reveals the two most important questions you can ask a person who is serious about moving forward in a project, any project, are:
1) What will you do next?
2) By when will you do it?

And the third key ingredient is the principle of "Return and Report." That simply means you can let the person know asap when you have completed a project (or wait until the next meeting). If you call, make it a business call. Hang up and call back if you want to chat. Your group goal needs to offer that kind of unconditional bias. A goal group is no place for "tough love" or ultimatums. The key is positive reinforcement.

Week after week, step by step. The new small business is successfully launched, the trip taken, the foreign language facilitated. The walk turns to a run as you triumphantly cross the finish line and look around for the next challenge. My vision groups goal is to challenge each other stretch, to reach higher than what we think we can do. I do have a little secret about my group; it's just two of us! That's right. And I know my friend (she might want to remain nameless for now) and I are both go-getters and very driven, so I am looking forward to what we can accomplish in 2012! I am so excited.

I didn't give a full review of this book in this blog post because today was mostly about my accountability group. I will say this book is GREAT. I really enjoyed it and plan to continue to refer back to it for motivation as well as new ideas. It really makes you "think" about your goals in a different way. It makes you want to approach them differently and expediently, at least it did for me. I already write a journal, but how I write in my journal will forever be changed. I bought this off of amazon for .12!! I caught a deal that day. #loveit

Excerpts from this blog were taking from the book Write it down; Make it happen by Henriette Klauser.

The Game Season Premier Review! I loved it, personally!

Did you see the game last night? OMG! I really enjoyed it. My husband and I (along with my friend Collie) went to see the premier of The Game at the Museum Bar in Atlanta last night. Since the actual official "Premier" was in L.A. the casting group held its own premier here in Atlanta last night for everyone that was involved in this season. Since I was an extra on the show, I wanted to go! We have never been to the museum bar, but it was very posh!

When we got inside, all the waitresses had on Saber Jersey's and they had blue and silver balloons everywhere. They also had this huge wall that the game was shown on via projector above the bar. We got there early because we wanted a seat. I am glad we did because it eventually became standing room only.

Now onto "The GAME". I really liked the season premier. I see that thousands felt the same way, because last time I checked it had over 56,000 likes and over 25,000 comments about last nights episode. I also believe that we needed that hour. Everything that was shown was definitely needed. It was no way it could have been a 30 minute show. Every storyline was full of emotion and made me fell like, "What would I do if..." Every character had major decisions to make and had a drama filled story line.

Melanie and Derwin: She admitted to having an abortion. We all wanted to know who she had an abortion by, Trey Wigs! I feel bad for Melanie. She had a good point, if she would have had his baby - would she really be with the love her life right now (Derwin)? Could he have handled her having someone else's baby like she did with Janey? Most likely not. But you never know. Do you think she should have told him back when it happened? Did he really need to know? I didn't like how he told her "Melanie, your lies and actions effect me!" Ummmm Derwin, your actions affected the relationship! Melanie was your girl and you cheated FIRST! That began the spiral of all things to come afterward. One thing I love about the chemistry between those two is that you can really see they love each other. And I love how Derwin is willing to work it out at all cost. I do not think he needed to punch Trey though! He didn't know Melanie got pregnant, but I guess that's a man for ya!

Malik and Tasha: This was emotional because Tasha was on a mental roller coaster. Should she choose her son or Derwin? That is a hard decision because business wise Derwin is the current cash cow! Malik is on his way o-u-t if he doesn't change in a big way! What would you do? One thing she needs to do is have more than one client! She needs to start scouting at the college games so she won't have all her eggs in one basket! I am surprised she doesn't know that. This is off the subject, but I still want Rick Fox to come back! ;) Malik and the model? I am so glad she wasn't dead, and I hope she gets it together because I liked what she did for Malik. She made him softer. And that made Malik so much more attractive.

Jason: His storyline was my least favorite because at first I couldn't see where it was going. I was thinking, is this whole hour going to be about him not like black girls but secretly loving them? It didn't get interesting until Brandy came on the scene. I knew she was going to be on the show but I didn't know the season would start with them getting married. Now I can't wait to see how this is going to pan out. I think Brandy looked great and I think she will fit in good with the cast. Jason also revealed why he only dated white women, because a black girl embarrassed him when he was young. So he was traumatized. Get over it Jason!

Is it just me or did you think TiTi was about to try to run game on Tasha Mac? I was thinking, Noooooooooo!! But I am glad he was trying to be the voice of reason.

Alright! Alright! Alriiiiight! (In my Kevin Hart voice!) It seems like this season is off to a great start! I do not know what week the episode I am on will air, but please know I will be watching!
Did you like it last night?



Do you have any HAIR GOALS for 2012? I do.

Do you have 2012 hair goals? I do. My hair goal is to have APL (arm pit length) by June. I am going to a friends wedding and my bi-annual Girls Weekend and I want my hair long and flowey! Last time we went to Miami! This time we are going to where the Bride is! I can't wait either. I am natural (have not put a chemical relaxer in my hair since Feb 2007). And since becoming natural I have learned so much about hair. Things I wish I would have known in high school, college and even after college because now I have the hair that I always wanted. I have thick, healthy, versatile hair! It's not because I do not have a relaxer either, it's because I know how to take care of my hair now. You can still have thick, healthy and versatile hair with a relaxer if you take care of your hair. But for me, not having a relaxer has just taken my hair and my education for hair to a whole other level.

I have applied things I have learned to even caring for my daughters hair. That is actually when I started researching hair. When my baby was one, her hair was short. And she had the littlest ponytails. I knew I wanted my baby's hair long and started researching hair growth. I learned that it's less about growing your hair because your hair is going to grow anyway (if you eat good, exercise, have less stress, etc.). It's actually more about retaining the hair is on your head! Protecting those ends (the most fragile part of the hair). It's a about a good regimen. I started washing her hair once a week and braiding her hair every week. She gets to wear pony tails on the weekend. I use good products on her hair, whatever I use on mine- I use on hers. And I keep her hair moisturized during braid out by misting with water and sealing with oils (Shea butter, coconut oil or others). My daugther just turned 4 and her hair is reaches down to the middle of her back! I saw what I was doing was working for her, so I started do it for myself. I don't wear braids through out the week, but I do try to wear protective styles to protect my ends. I wear twist sets, or roll my hair with flexi rods, or just buns. I too, get creative on the weekends and let it hang out. Also, I do not straighten my hair often. I usually do it for special occasions which averages to once every 3 to 4 months! I probably won't straighten it again until Mothers Day, then for the wedding in June.

Well, I follow SimpYouniqe on YouTube and she just got these BIOTIN vitamins and wanted to give them a try. They are for hair, nails & skin. It's funny because I have been thinking about getting the vitamins before I even saw her post. When I saw her post, I just took the plunge and bought them. They are pricey ($10.69 but I had a coupon for $2 off and they were 50% off! So I paid $3.) Love a deal. Right now my hair is past my shoulders but not the length I want yet, so for the next 5 months I really need to stick to my regimen and protective styles. This picture was taken in November. I had just gotten my hair straightened at a Dominican shop. I know it's not the greatest picture, sorry. I will do better next time. I pray these vitamins do something! I will let you all know.

Do you have any hair goals?

Happy New Year to you & Happy Birthday to me!!

Happy New Year to you! And Happy Birthday to me! I know I am 9 days late but I needed a break. If you noticed I took a much need 3 month break from writing on the blog. Actually, I took a break from alot of other things too. I got off Facebook for three months, I stopped participating in some other activities. I just took a break. All I did was work (still need that MU-LAH!) and came home and did what "The Hubby" and children needed me to do. It actually felt good to have "Nothing" to do. During the down time, I thought alot. I made goals for 2012. And I rested. I was still tired because my children are young and they still go 24/7 but I wasn't as tired as I was with all I was doing. I reassessed what was a priority for 2012 and have had to let somethings go. I did not make any resolutions (I usually don't). I started making mental changes in October 2011. I do have goals I want to reach and do it more proactively. I even have a accountability partner now. We will meet every two weeks with goals to accomplish by the next meeting. We had our first  meeting today. I think this is going to go GREAT! We will both hold each other to a standard to get things accomplished. One thing I love about my accountability partner is that she is a go-getter, so I now she will keep me motivated. She already gave me a task on day 1, that I was wreaking my brain over how am I going to get this done in two weeks!

Now! For my birthday weekend - I had a ball. My bestie's celebrated with me all weekend. My Florida BFF came up and stayed with me from Wed-Mon. My Alabama BFF came from Fri-Sun, and my local GA BFF attended Saturday and Sunday's festivities! Thursday, I showed Aseelah around Atlanta. She actually lived her years ago but so much had changed. We also picked up her NY BFF who flew down for the weekend too! Friday, we all went to get massages and OMG, that was the best massage I have ever had. That lady had me looking up every few minutes thinking, ...... I am not even gonna say. But she was good! ;) Friday night, we went to the comedy club and saw 4 comedians and every single one was funny. It was a party of 11 and they gave us the front row! And thank God they didn't get me, but a few of the crew got blasted on! Nothing to harsh. After the comedy club we headed to Pearls Bistro. I had never been here, but I will be going back. The cool part is that we were able to get into both events FREE!! Nothing beats kicking it for "Free!" We danced our little hearts out Friday night! It was like we were back in college.

Saturday morning, I went to get my hair blown out and headed to my birthday Luncheon at Ted's Montana Grill. Again, everything was great. The food, the conversation. It just felt good being with friends. After the lunch, Aseelah and I went back home to get ready for NYE night. Tosha and Collie went their direction because they went to the club. Aseelah and I went to church with my husband and children. It was a blessing to bring in the new year praising God.

Sunday, of course we got right back up and went to church. After church we ate dinner at my mom's house. Then we rested and headed out SKATING! That's right. We went to Sparkles and had a great time. My mom even came out and skated. Can you believe my mom can skate better than me. I am good, but she is REAL GOOD. Now my friend Aseelah, poor little tink tink! She bragged that skating is like riding a bike. She hadn't skated since she was 7 and she just knew she was going to get out there and flow! It was so funny, she went around maybe 4 times and sat her behind on the bench! She still had a great time. Monday was my actually birthday. Me, The Hubby, my mom and Aseelah went to my favorite restaurant and then it was time to take her to the airport! Even though it was a great weekend, I still had to get up and go to work the next day. I was on an 11 day vacation but still felt like I needed a break! I think that I am going to have a skate party for my birthday next year because it was just so much fun!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!! If you have goals, dreams, visions or resolutions - work on them! Faith without works is dead! 

Do you like my Bernetta J Blige picture?

Joyful Noise Movie Review

My husband and I were able to go to the Joyful Noise pre-screening last Wednesday night. It was actually a delightful movie. We knew it would be a feel good movie and you could kind of predict the ending but everything in between was a pleasure to watch.

The movie stars Queen Latifah and Dolly Parton. Keke Palmer plays the daughter of Queen Latifah and happens to learn a lot of life lessons during this movie. The movie is about a church choir who never makes it past regionals because of another choir headed by Kirk Franklin (of course he's a character). Well, by a strange twist of fate and some updating their sound and moves - miracles happen. What didn't I like about this movie? I didn't like that everything Dolly Parton had on was super fitted! Her choir rob, her shirts, EVERYTHING! Do you really have to show your shape in every shot!!! Geeesssh! I didn't like the amount of cursing in the movie. It was NOT alot by any means and I understand that in reality people to curse so I wasn't offended, just felt it was unnecessary at times.

Would I recommend it. Yes, for the matinee. I really liked the movie and so did "The Hubby". We laughed, got mad, had those moments where you looked at each other and said, "I know he didn't..." and we even bopped our head when they sang. I hope it does well at the box office because it deserves too. You know sometimes you look at a preview and say, "I will wait for this to come out on video." I actually thought about doing that for this movie, but after seeing it I say, "Go see it. Just go to the matinee!"

Do you think you will go?

I visited Sweet Aurburn Bread Company!

Have you ever been to Atlanta? Have you ever been on the historic Auburn Ave? Have you ever been to the Sweet Auburn Bread Company? Well if you haven't, you need to. Earlier this week, I was able to visit this great bakery in the heart of Atlanta. It is owned and operated by Chef Sonya (pictured on the left) for the past 15 years this upcoming January. I was given a great opportunity to interview her for my show (more details to come about that show later) and learned that she met the President of the United States, Bill Clinton. She even served him her original Sweet Potato Cheesecake. After President Clinton gave it two thumbs up, that dessert quickly became her signature item. People from all over the country request in her words, "What the President had!"   

Of course I was curious, so I asked can I have a taste? Honestly, I am not a huge fan of sweet potato's. I am actually trying to start eating them more because I know they are good for you. Because of that, I was kind of nervous to taste it because I was praying I would like it. Well, she offered a slice and I grabbed the fork and said a little prayer, "Please let this be good!". Annnnnnnd, it was!! The cheesecake was so cool (meaning, chilled in a good way). It melted on my tongue. It tasted like a sweet-sweet potato mixed with cheesecake and I could not stop eating it. The sweet potato taste wasn't over powering, but it was as equally present as the cheesecake flavor. I truly gave it two thumbs up, so I see my the President did!

One thing that I learned about Chef Sonya is that she bakes EVERYTHING FRESH EVERYDAY from scratch for 15 years! Wow! You can not get better than fresh. She makes everything from cakes, cookies, muffins, cheesecakes, pies & more. She also just published a new dessert cookbook that is featured on The Food Network as a must buy! She was even featured on the network with Rachel Ray! So if you are ever in Atlanta and on Auburn rd, please visit Sweet Auburn Bread Co, to satisfy your sweet tooth.

Her website is: http://www.sweetauburnbread.com/

Purchase her cookbook here at: http://store.sweetauburnbread.com/swaude.html

Food Network: http://www.foodnetwork.com/local/ga-atlanta/sweet-auburn-bread-company-restaurant/index.html

I finally got to meet "DERWIN" from "The GAME!"

I have a vision board and on the board I have a section that says, Meet These People... Well on that list is Oprah, The Obamas, Tyler Perry, Mary J Bilge & The Cast of the Game. Well well well, last week I got the opportunity to be an extra on the set of BET's "The GAME"! When I got the call, I called ev-ver-ry-bod-dy!! I was just going to be an extra, but I was also going to meet my long time tv crush! I am natural (without relaxer) and I usually wear my hair in twist or in a protective style* (email me and I will tell you more about hair care!). But when I got the call, I headed straight to the Dominicans and got my hair straightened, got my lashes and make-up done! Do you like my dress? I do. I also LOVE that is was only $6 at Target! We had to come to the set with make-up already ready. I knew I was fine that day! LOL!

When I got to set they made me change to this purple dress. :( For the scene we where shooting for, the purple dress was more appropriate. I guess. So be on the look out for me in the background sometime in February in my purple dress with my feather boa! I don't say anything but give a facial expression here and there! So... did I meet Pooch Hall? Yes I did. It was quick, fast and in a freaking hurry. It's so funny because we shot for two days and we were in the room together for both those days. He was even arms touching lengths away from me so many times, I almost choked! (Well the first day I did. By the second I was cool). So day 1, I said to myself, it's either now or never. So, we were standing near each other watching Malik and Jason act a scene out. I leaned over and said, "Hello Pooch! I have always wanted to meet you! I love your character and I am a twitter follower!" He smiled and said, "Oh really! That's what's up!" He put his hand out to shake my hand and said, "What's your name?" I told him. It looks like he was about to say something else to me but someone grabbed him away to do something. And that was the extent of our convo! The rest of the evening he didn't say anything nor did he the next day. He is very silly. He plays all the time. I think if it were an atmosphere where I could just be me, we would get along great but he was free to be himself. And I had to be "professional". Is he cute in person. Yes. Is he like Derwin, no. Will I still crush on him now. Probably not. Who will I crush on now? Malik. I could not stop staring at him. He was nice, slim, and so handsome. I didn't say anything to him until day 2. I just told him, I really like the show and keep up the good work. He said "Thank you and nice to meet you too!" ....... um um ummm. Also I met Jason Pitts! We actually had a convo about kids. He was a pleasure to speak with as well. I didn't get to meet the famous Tasha Mac because she wasn't there for my scene. I did get to meet Tia. I said "Hi Tia!" She said, "Hi!" smiled, and kept on walking. Yep. Kept on walking. I was kind of disappointed by that, mainly because I love her character and I wanted to really meet her and for her to just give me a "Hi!" and keep walking....well, at least I met her. 

I can say that 2 of my visions (on my vision board) came true this week. 1. I acted on a sitcom. 2. I met the cast of The Game. I will never forget this experience. Now I need my "Dancing with the Stars" vision to come true!

I won! I won! I won the contest!

Guess what! I won the Black Swan Style Swap Contest. I received the news two weeks ago but I just haven't been able to update my blog. The contest ended on October 31 and I emailed the lady in charge on November 4th to find out the results. Well, she called me right back and told me she has good news for me! She said, "Not only were you a finalist and won $500 but you are also the Grand Prize Winner of $4,500!!!" What a grand total of $5,000! I almost jumped out of my office! I was so excited and so thankful. BUT BUT BUT the not so great news is that I won't get it until early.2012.  So no Christmas shopping with that money! It is still a blessing none the less. The original gift was supposed to be a trip for two to Boston, hotel stay, and more. They decided to just give the value of the grand prize. That is fine with me!

I am so happy and I appreciate all the votes from my friends and family! It really did matter. It really did count!

Black Swan Wine Contest: VOTE FOR ME!!

Click the link to VOTE for me http://www.blackswanwine.com/Sip-and-Swap/Style-Swap.asp

Back in June, I went to a Fashion Swap hosted by the Swapaholics, sponsored by Black Swan Wine. It was actually at the Atlanta Zoo. The event was great too. I actually saw the Swapaholics on Dateline in November 2010 and started doing my own fashion swaps after that! We (Teresa & I) call ourselves the Swap-Tastics!

Before the night was over, a represenative from Black Swan told me to enter the competition by taking a picture of myself in a something I got at this swap! I was like, "I can do that!" I went home and made my hubby snap 1 million (ok exaggerating) pictures and submitted this one! And just last week, I get a call that I am finalist!! I was shock and SUPER excited. I thought of the famous line, "It's a honor just being nominated!" But the truth is, I want to win. So can you please support me and vote for me. The contest end on 10/31/11 and it's a great grand prize. Cash & a trip to Boston to do MORE SWAP SHOPPING!

Thanks for your support!! Please share the link with your friends and facebook!
http://www.blackswanwine.com/Sip-and-Swap/Style-Swap.asp

DAMN! I have to give up some more STUFF???!!!!!

Do you find yourself sacrificing more than your husband since you got married? What types of things do you or have you given up in order to make the marriage work? Have you given your money towards your husband’s dreams? Have you sacrificed your credit? Have you put your dreams on hold? How did that work out for you?



I was at a wedding a few weeks ago and the Minister said to the WIFE-TO-BE (as he was marrying the couple), "...Help your husband make his dreams come true..." I was taken aback and even caught a small attitude for a moment. I made a face and even did a little smirk over at my own husband! The minister didn't tell the husband to be to 'help make his wife's dreams come true!’ Or even tell the wife to make sure you make your own dreams come true TOO! Or does that not matter when you get married? Is it all about the husband’s vision and dreams? And should your dreams, goals and vision be tied into his? And if yours are different that means putting yours on the back burner so his can be manifested first? Man, this is heavy. I know we are created to be our husband's helpmate BUT ........... (right here I have gotten speechless...) I will end this blogpost for today.

Do you TALK DIRTY? Here are some tips!

Talking dirty, if not your usual cup of tea, can seem a bit intimidating or trashy. What do I say? How do I say it? Will I sound silly? And yes, its a bit trashy and for lack of a better word. Lets substitute "trashy" with SPICY! Change your mindset and challenge yourself to step outside of your comfort zone for a minute. You never know, it may be just the spark needed to light a fire in your relationship.
You can start with a simple text message about how "hot" your spouse looks today. Lean in or come up from behind and extend an invitation to engaged in something naughty softly in your spouses ear...Thoughts? Still feel embarrassed or is that not SPICY enough?With these tips I discovered from Dr. Laura, you can shake your nerves and say what you want, the way YOU want to say it. Check this out!


- The first is to take a paragraph from a sexy story. Lift a passage from your favorite Danielle Steel, or do an online search for "erotica." Type up the text, then go through it and delete key words. If you ever played Mad Libs as a kid, you know how it works: Nouns, adjectives, verbs, and adverbs are replaced by your partner with no sense of the story's real context. Only this time, the vocabulary's a bit more grown-up! I never played "Mad Libs" but I do like the idea of searching sexy or erotic love stories for ideas!

- The other way is to take the driest writing and sex it up with a "naughty words only" rule. Try a news story from today's headlines, or clip an ad from a magazine. It's fun to see how sexy you can get about fabric softener! This may help you shake some nerves. Its simple and you can play with some dirty vocabulary and incorporate it into daily conversation. For example, "Hey babe. Did you hear about the news story on high frutose corn syrup? Not sure what the fuss is about, but I like the thought of something sweet and sticky. What you about you?" I don't know...just trying to help. Not too bad for off the top if you ask me! LOL

- If games aren't your thing, you can still spice up your connection with the power of the written word. Read erotica out loud in the bedroom before you hit the sack (think options such as Best Sex Writing 2010by Rachel Kramer Bussel, Afternoon Delight: Erotica For Couplesby Alison Tyler, Flipside Erotica presents: Both Sides of the Story Vol. 1 by Darren Michaels, and Bitten: Dark Erotic Stories by Susie Bright) As you read the stories, you will likely come up with a whole host of ideas to keep you busy well into the night. If you decide to forgo the dirty talk, maybe a kinky text or email? You can use these tips for inspiration. Or if you are a "I can show better than I can tell you type", this tip can still help get YOU in the mood for a SPICY night!

- Another idea is to write you partner a x-rated love note. If you are like most couples, you have likely exchanged love letters in this past, but this note will be a completely different animal. Be graphic and bold, and spell out every little thing you want to do your partner and vice versa. If you are seeking inspiration, turn to written erotica or check out a classic collection of poetry by authors such poets such as Robert Herrick, C. P. Cavafy, Walt Whitman, and e.e cummings. I know my husband would respond well to a sexy love letter. Leave it on his pillow. Mix it in to his pile of bills. Add a few naughty items to his "Honey Do List" on the fridge. (If it's private. Don't want the kids or company to see it I suppose.)
On "Talking Dirty"

Hearing your partner’s voice whispering his most intimate highly erotic, and doing the same for him will feel incredibly naughty and empowering. Feeling shy? Start slow by simply moaning or cooing your approval whenever he strokes or touches you in just the right way. Then, move forward to whispering your pleasure by saying “That feels so good” or “I love it when you touch me like that.” After you break those barriers (and see how much your partner enjoys it), you will feel bold enough to start being more graphic and uninhibited.
After you master dirty talk, try being more vocal about your hidden fantasies and desires. Whisper your secret fantasies to your partner over a intimate, candlelit dinner, and seduce him with your inner desires as you lay cuddling in bed. Whether you turn to mad libs, erotica, poetry, or the spoken word, just make sure to give voice your desires and harness the sexy power of words.
Dr. Laura Berman is a world renowned sex and relationship expert who is considered a thought leader and innovator in her field. As a sex educator, researcher and therapist for more than 20 years, she has helped countless couples build stronger relationships, improve their sex lives, and achieve a heightened level of intimacy. Her new television show, In The Bedroom with Dr. Laura Berman, is featured on OWN, the Oprah Winfrey Network, at 10 pm Monday evenings. She is also the Host of The Dr. Laura Berman Show on Oprah Radio on XM 111 and Sirius 204 at 5 PM EST.
This article was taken from Spicy Wifey Blog. I thought it was a good topic and wanted to share!

Have you ever "LOST" your Mojo? (Updated)

I am TIRED. Have you ever been TIRED as a mother? I am NOT saying, tired of being a mom (even though it's possible to feel like that too!), but right now I am asking, "Have you ever been just TIRED because of all the things that come along with being the responsible MOTHER (& wife)?"


What did you do to get your mojo back? How long did you say in that slump? Could your kids tell? Could your husband tell? What would you do when no one was around? Lately my energy level is not there. I am pooped. I still go where I need to go and take care of my responsibilities, but after that I am singing the praises of the bed or the couch. I just want to sit and look at the wall. I know that is crazy to say, but I either need a VACATION or a BREAK. I started back taking my vitamins, not sure if that is going to make a difference. Have you ever felt just drained?

Update: I took a break from LIFE September - December. Meaning, I didn't do any outside activites (except when I got the call to be an extra on Tyler Perry's House of Payne & BET's The Game!! Couldn't miss that!) But anything else, NO! I went to work, came home, did the WIFE & MOM thing. And once the kids were off to bed. I was on the couch relaxing! All my activities, I put on hold. I even closed my facebook account! I wanted to revamp! Revive myself. And honestly in January, I wasn't ready to come back to LIFE (so to speak) but I know I needed to because I have responsibilities outside of being a wife & mother. I do feel so much better even though, I was just telling my husband I am still tired. I am not even doing as much as I was but I already want a break. I think it's because working a FT job & being a MOM (&WIFE) is already time consuming - but mix in ALL THE EXTRAS - it's alot. I think it takes good time management and the discipline to say NO!

Do you look older than your husband?

My husband and I met another couple and chit chatted for a while. My husband had never met either person before. When we left he asked how old were they. I told him I didn't know. Well, he then says "She looks older than him!" I agreed. I said it seems that they have been together for a while because they have two children but I am not sure if she is older or it just looks that way. It got me to thinking.....is looking older than your husband a bad thing? We didn't talk anymore about it, but just the fact he asked me that made me wonder. Do you want your wife to look younger than you? Do you want to look younger than your husband? I think I kinda do (want to look younger). No one has ever told me I look older than my husband, but I think I might feel some kinda way about that, especially since I am 2 years younger than him. I am not saying that it's a bad thing to look older than your man, especially since we are in an age where more older women are dating & marrying younger men. I am just asking, would it bother you if someone made that comment?

Do you have gender specific roles?

Hello, today I would like to ask the question do you and your husband have gender specific roles? Do you do certain things because you ARE the WIFE or because you are just better at it? Do you cut the grass, does your husband pay the bills? Did you discuss this or did it just happen? Does it even matter?

What do you do if your HUSBAND'S SNORING KEEPS YOU AWAKE?

I actually received a call from a friend with this question. I love it. I love the fact the people want their questions posted and comments from other wives. That's exactly why this blog exist. So let's dig in.

In this situation the husband SNORES. Really snores. He snores so loud and so heavy that the WIFE actually gets up and sleeps on the couch in the middle of the night. She agrees that she sleeps better next to her hubby but, she can NOT sleep when he snores which is more often that not. If she nudges him, it wakes him up and disturbs his sleep (even though he says "Wake me up!") If she doesn't wake him up, she won't sleep. Now my husband snores sometimes, usually if he is super tired. He says I do the same (snore when I'm tired). It has never been that bad that I had to leave the room, and I won't hesitate to knocking him in the head a couple times and saying, "Hey! Hey!!! Turn over!"

They have been to the doctor and he does have condition. I can't quite remember the name she called it or what actually makes him snore but something is going on. She said that getting the snoring machine is really not an option due to financial reasons, but I suggested it might be worth making payments on such a machine. You have to sleep! You need a good night sleep to function. And who wants to have to sleep on the couch for the remainder of the marriage. I know I am exaggerating, but still. I have actually seen on TV talk shows couples that have separate bedrooms because the spouse snores, but is that something you really want to do? I think that in this age of technology, there is no way that something can't be done about his snoring. It's all about how bad do you want a good night sleep.

Ladies, feel free to weigh in!

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W.I.F.E (WIFE Why Isn't Forever Easy)

Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011)

OMG! Did you see this movie? I was fortunate enough to see a pre-screening (which was probably the only way I would have seen it) and really enjoyed it. I have never watched any of the other Planet of the Apes and really had no desire too. What peaked my interest was Whoopi and Sherri on The View. They spoke so highly of it that I sought out free tickets and got them!

Now, I haven't seen any of the other movies but watching this movie didn't make it seemed like I needed to. I was happy about that. This movie kept my eyes glued to the screen the entire time. The monkey was so real. His actions, his gestures and most of all his personality. He scared me at times but at the same time, I felt sorry for him. And if you saw the movie, the last three words that were spoken at the end of the movie made all of us gasp! I don't want to give too much away so I will stop while I am ahead, but I say it's a must see.

What does my husband need to do to keep me from cheating!

I know this is an interesting question, but last night at church we were having a forum discussion. Members put questions in a box and the mediators would pull and ask a question to the crowd. Anyone has an opportunity to answer. Well, one the questions last night was just the opposite from the title of this blog. It was “What does a WIFE need to do for her husband, so he does not cheat on her?” When I first heard this question, I really didn’t like it. Mainly because I don’t spend my days thinking, ‘How do I keep my man faithful?’ Then I thought what about the other way around. Women cheat too. And now-a-days if the husband is not acting right, women (not saying I would, I am just saying…) will go astray. Since the creation of Facebook and Twitter, statistics on women cheating are up 60%.


On this particular question (“What does a WIFE need to do for her husband, so he does not cheat on her?”) Most of the men answered. Mostly ALL of them said “Do not close up shop!” I think for women that is a no brainer, we know our man likes sex. But one gentleman made an all around great point. He said his wife needs to be everything and nothing! Everything, meaning she of course needs to fulfill his needs but be able to stimulate his mind. Be able to give him conversation and go along with the vision he sets for the house. Also he said “Never deny him sex!” which I don’t agree with, because if I don’t want to do it – I DON’T WANT TO DO IT! Then he said 'nothing'. Nothing meaning it depends on the maturity of the man, because a woman can be all that to you and a bag of chips but if the man is a dog, he is just a dog! It depends if the man is ready to be faithful and desires to be faithful to his wife. Statistics also show 1 out of 3 men cheat on their wives.

A lot of men were going back and forth and I just kept thinking, what about the women. What does my husband have to do to keep me from cheating? He has to be my EVERY-FREAKING-THING! He has to listen to me. Really listen to me. I want him to give me what he knows I need and my wants (within reason, he says I am spoiled). I want him to BLOW MY MIND more often than not (and you already know what I mean!). I want to be able to talk about everything with him, like politics, children topics, and even when I feel emotionally unstable. I want him to do what I ask him within a reasonable amount of time (and not have to ask him 50 million times and then end up doing it myself). I want him to be romantic without me nudging him to do that! (The men didn’t like that!) I want him to be hands on with the kids (he’s a great daddy, I must say!). I want him not to mind holding hands in public or showing affection. I want him to LOVE GOD and not afraid to show it. I want him to be strong and a leader in our house but not so strong that he is overbearing or controlling. I want him to be a motivator and my number one cheerleader. I want him to wash the dishes! LOL! I want him to have goals and let us (the family) see him working towards those goals. I want him to be “My Husband!” In return, I will do the same for him; at least I am trying to.

I also am not saying that if he doesn't do any or all of these things, I will go and cheat. I was just answering the question. Smile.